THANKFULNESS

Last night I had one of those nights....I left work feeling EXTREMELY tired, my back hurt, when I got home with the kiddo's,Tiana needed tons of help with her homework, nothing was going the way she wanted it to and  Evan just wanted me to hold him,  I couldn't even get dinner started and I knew my hubby would be arriving home soon from work.

Lucky for me he called first and stopped and picked up something for dinner.  Extra points for him!!  He makes it home with dinner I try to eat but there is to much going on.  Finally I reached my max, I started complaining out loud about how there was so many things that could be different if this was this way or if that could go this way.  Needless to say it didn't make me feel any better so we called it a night and all went to bed.

Upon waking this morning I noticed all the stress of the night before was gone and it was a new day. I have a hour long drive to work so I do a lot of thinking in the car, it seems to be the only time I am ever alone and have a clear head.  As my mind starts to go I just keep thinking about how unhappy I was with myself for acting the way I did.  As an adult and parent I should suck it up and take my stress and release it elsewhere, I know this..........

With all that being said.  Thinking about the coming Holiday of Thanksgiving.  I try and think of all the things I am thankful for, trying to keep a list going in my head.  Before I realize my list is to long and there are so many that I could NEVER put them in order.  It made me feel even worse about last night.  I am so thankful and so blessed for everything in my life.  I just wish I knew how to express it better, I know we are human and fall short but still it bothers me.

I guess the realization I am coming to is knowing you are thankful is one thing,but actually being able to show it is not always easy.  This is something I want to work on personally....being able to show my thankfulness to others.  The ones who don't hear my prayers and read my heart.